Posts tagged "art"
I am a selfish maker.
It took me a very long time to realize this, to recognize this piece of myself.
I do not make for recognition nor do I make “Fine Art”.
What I make, what I do, is basic survival.
I make because I feel so much.
I never wanted to make others feel, I am selfish like that. I made this thing because my soul is a bottomless pit and I am hungry; I am devouring life and this is how I can let it escape.
I am so fickle today. Maybe it’s the rain, but parts of me feel ready to explode. I sit on the couch to calm my nerves. I don’t even know why I’m nervous. I can’t source it.
I want to read, but the words make me impatient. I want to listen to music and have a beer but the music seems hollow. I want to paint some but the task seems too daunting. I have commissions I need to finish but my heart isn’t in them.
Being this way; a creative, is a blessing and a curse. I wonder how normal people function with their normal tasks and simple interests. I wonder how they can sit and watch tv without having their minds wander. I wonder about a life with my head down on Earth instead of up in the clouds.
Today I’m fickle, but at least I still feel.